These unprecedented times have created so many radical shifts in terms of how we operate in our personal and professional lives. Those operating in front line services have the gratitude of the nation, capturing our hearts and minds as they work tirelessly to keep us safe, supported and connected.
For those of us not occupied in front line services, life is currently very different. Whether you have been furloughed or have adapted to working from home, many of us have experienced a new phenomenon. The gift of having a little more time!
Prior to this period of lockdown, have you ever been guilty of blaming your lack of focus or underperformance of a task on a lack of time? Whether that lack was real or perceived, it is a phrase I have heard frequently in my capacity as a coach and mentor. I confess during my tenures as a CEO, I too blamed a lack of time for certain shortcomings. In particular, it was the justification for my lack of focus on my own personal development. This lack of focus manifested in different forms, one of which was neglecting my physical health. One real positive in this difficult period is witnessing how so many people have challenged themselves to overhaul their physical fitness.
Another form it manifested itself was believing I was too time poor to seek out opportunities to be mentored and indeed to mentor (outside my immediate line management responsibilities). In this time of social distancing, lockdown and isolation, I believe there has never been a more relevant time to explore the plethora of benefits that arise from being a mentor and a mentee. I am pursuing this philosophy personally and promoting it professionally.
A Mentor is defined as ‘an experienced and trusted advisor.’
In my experiences as a sporting Chief Executive, I witnessed first hand the array of benefits of mentoring, operating on a daily basis within elite sporting teams. However as many of you will appreciate this critical practice is not the exclusive preserve of professional sport. Who can remember the wise old head who was on hand to welcome you into your amateur football, rugby or cricket team? The roles of mentor and mentee are an integral component of the culture of all sporting organisations. The concept of senior players guiding and supporting the development of young players has become common practice.
What is surprising is that despite many of us having experienced positive mentoring experiences in our sporting careers we do not seek to embed them in our professional roles and organisations.
Why?
One challenge is the comparative size differences of the organisations. In a professional (or amateur) rugby club for example you may be looking at circa thirty players. In business, the staffing numbers can run into hundreds and indeed thousands. Naturally it is far easier for senior players to stay connected and build deeper relationships with younger players in a group of thirty than it is for senior leaders in business who may have several layers of leadership and staff between them and the youngest of their colleagues.
In business we find that we have endless policies and induction procedures that have to be handled by the HR department when new staff join. It follows therefore that in many organisations the perception has grown that it is now the role of the staff in HR to fulfil the role of mentor. However in my experience they induct and they support in times of real challenge but they do not mentor - at least not in the purest sense of the role. If you look back at the definition of a mentor - ‘an experienced and trusted advisor’, no HR Director can be expected to be experienced in every role operating within their business. Naturally they have a role to play but to use a sporting reference, they are not “position specific”.
In sporting teams, a young goalkeeper will work with and be mentored by a senior goal keeper, a half back in rugby will work with and be mentored by other half backs. This is a common sense approach that ensures that the young player or mentee is learning from the experience and knowledge of senior players in the same position. Turning back to business, a young sales person needs a relationship with senior commercial staff. A young accountant needs to spend time with senior members of the finance department.
For those unfamiliar with the process, the benefits of mentoring are numerous. I will touch on a handful. From the perspective of the mentee, he or she is able to accelerate their learning process as they absorb lessons from their mentor who has walked the road they wish to tread. They are able to extract knowledge from the positive and negative experiences and absorb years of learning that the mentor gained through their experience and deposit that learning into their own skill set.
As a consequence of the mentoring process, mentors naturally evolve into becoming passionate advocates of their mentee. As we all try and adapt to what the new normal will become, it is in all of our interests to develop our networks, and having a well connected mentor will undoubtedly help identify opportunities that we may otherwise have missed.
The benefits to the organisation that employs the mentee are numerous, particularly if they initiate the mentoring process. The employee feels valued as a result of the teaching and guidance that they receive from their mentor and as a consequence they settle quickly, embrace the culture and perform better in their role.
In my opinion the most important benefit in the whole process is experienced by the mentor. Human beings are, by design, social creatures with a need for connection and contribution. This period of lock down, social distancing and isolation is having a significant detrimental affect on our ability to meet those needs. Becoming a mentor is a perfect antidote. Not only does it bring connection, but there is a deep satisfaction and sense of joy that comes from being able to help somebody grow by acting as their mentor.
Some of you will be reading this article and be fully aware of the benefits of mentoring and will be operating as a mentee or mentor currently. However it is safe to assume that this group will be in the minority.
The key question therefore is what is stopping us?
In my experience, there are several reasons why people do not make contact with a potential mentor. The first is a lack of confidence. Individuals do not believe they are worthy to take up the time of their aspirational mentor. So they do not take action and do not make contact! What is worst that can happen? They say no. Ask the question and you will be surprised at how many say yes. Most will be flattered to be asked. Even if they are not willing to mentor you, they will usually at the very least offer some advice.
Another reason is believing it does not apply to them. Drawing upon my sporting and business experience where the mentoring process exists, it tends to focus heavily on the youngest staff and/or players who are invariably the most recent recruits. Once staff or players become established, the mentoring process tends to fizzle out and stop. I believe the perception that mentoring is purely for the benefit of young, inexperienced staff is widespread. It is a complete misconception. We are never too old to learn from the wisdom and experience of our peers, irrespective of the role you hold. You can be the CEO or Chair but there are still innumerable amounts of people from whom you can learn from.
Last but not least? You guessed it - a lack of time! People do not feel they have the diary space to become a mentor or mentee. So we end where we began. We have been given a gift of additional time. There are many ways to utilise it, both positively and of course negatively. Please consider taking the steps to become a mentor or mentee and for the ultimate call to action, why not do both? Develop yourself whilst at the same time developing others.
Who can you reach out to to learn from as a mentor, and who can you take under your wing as a mentee? In each case they may be individuals within your organisation or outside it.
It would be wonderful if a positive from these uncertain times was creating a new wave of connection and collaboration. Initiating new mentoring relationships that drive our personal and business performance, but that also fulfil that human desire for connection and contribution. At a time when many of us have never felt so isolated, we have an opportunity to connect and discover the deep sense of fulfilment and joy in mentoring, adding real value and positively impacting someone’s life.
To work with our team at The Lonely Leader contact us at hello@thelonelyleader.co.uk
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